My husband is a great husband. He is also a great father to our children. And no, he doesn’t need you stopping to “fangirl” all over him as we walk by. Just because my daughter is in a wheelchair. Yes, she is adorable and they are cute together. I get it, I do. I know they are quite a pair together. He’s so broad and tall and she’s so petite. He does take such good care of her as he makes sure she is seated in the correct position and has everything she needs. He stops and asks her questions and makes sure the rest of the kids are in a line around the chair.
Here is the thing though – he’s just a dad. He’s doing what dads should do. He’s taking care of his kid. Whether we are in the grocery store or in the park. I realize some dads don’t do these things, aren’t tentative or care. Some dads are too into their hobbies or their phones. Some dads simply don’t pay attention when they come home and leave all the child-rearing to “mom,” but not my husband.
In my opinion, he’s doing his half for our team. He’s participating in our relationship and being a father to the kids, plain and simple. I’m truly sorry if you think this is so “awe-worthy,” but it’s not. Men, if they have children, should take care of them. My husband is doing that. It’s not complicated and it shouldn’t be rare or special.
Dads of all ages with kids of all sizes should be normalized for their parent rearing. Why do dad’s get a gold star? Moms don’t get a gold star. Since when and why are we applauding them for something they should just be doing? This is something that if women disappeared /divorced /died, that my husband would need to do anyway?! If he didn’t live with me, he’d have to do the dishes too! If I wasn’t around he’d have the kids sometimes.
This doesn’t need congratulations or a party. Men just need to step up. Women need to not be making it seem like there is a pedestal there though. This isn’t helping anyone. Just my two cents. I never made it seem like this was a favor to me, it was always just part of the deal. I never made it seem like this was something to be his “pat on the head” reward program.
My other kids see the example in what we set before them. They see us as a team. I’m glad that at least for the time being, the kids don’t notice all of the fangirls. It’s not a good example for anyone, really. So, I guess it’s not just my husband that doesn’t need your fangirling, it’s my kids and your kids too.