From a person not struggling with addiction, infidelity or betrayal in their relationship:

Q: What do you suggest couples do if they find themselves stuck in difficult arguments/quarrels?


Savvy Answers:

Firstly, couples will have times they disagree throughout their partnership. That is normal and even healthy.

However, it’s not healthy when the argument has disrespect, contempt, power issues, and violence.

If you and your partner are finding there are certain topics that you are disagreeing on (i.e. what car to buy or where to send your child to school), it can become stressful.

Oftentimes couples can come to topics with this idea that they are right, or they feel their partner is the enemy. That is not the most beneficial way to approach communication with your partner.

The best way to combat that is to remember you and your partner are on the same team (even having a piece of paper taped on the fridge as a reminder if you’re relationship is getting that unhealthy can help you when you come to discuss sensitive topics).

Now, there are going to be certain things that you and your partner may never agree on, and if those things are not significant you can accept those things.

However if you and your partner will never agree on key issues like having kids, then that is a sign the relationship is most likely not going to be a long-term relationship without resentment building up.

So, without specific details on what the arguments are about and the status of your relationship (healthy and happy, unhealthy and want to work on it, toxic/abusive) that is the best I can answer the question.

If you’re looking for 1:1 support through this, know you can always apply to become a 1:1 client with this Coaching Client Application.


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