Meet Sam: A Real Knight in Shining Armor
Meet a Real Life Warrior
Meet a Real Knight in Shining Armor
“Before joining The Warriors program I was feeling lost and hopeless. Our biggest obstacle was that I didn’t think my husband would allow me to spend money to join Warriors and I certainly didn’t think he’d pay to join Knights. We eventually reached a point where we both were stuck and I told him I was joining Warriors whether he liked it or not. That’s when he decided he would join Knights.
Being in this program, I’m feeling hopeful that my life will be much more peaceful whether or not my marriage lasts. I feel empowered and more confident in myself!
I have gained so much peace and confidence through this program. I’ve also gained some great friendships with ladies who have experienced the same type of trauma and I am forever grateful for the opportunity to create those connections!!
The most valuable module for me was BRoACH! It’s changed my life!!!! Learning how to properly set appropriate boundaries & enforce them with consequences has given me so much peace!! The Purge was also something that I didn’t realize we needed to do but I’m so thankful we did it now!!
My husband & I can now talk about his betrayals without him getting defensive. He has learned how to be more empathetic & gives me the space I need to process my emotions. We’ve only had sex 2 times since completing our 90 days however, those two times we were more emotionally connected than we have ever been in our 22 years of marriage. Our fighting has also decreased & our communication with each other has greatly increased both with the quality & quantity of intimate conversations. My husband is finally starting to desire a more intimate connection.
I appreciate how all the coaches specialize in different areas that are vital to recovery & not just because you’ve studied it but because you’ve lived it. Chloe doesn’t beat around the bush and speaks her mind. Savvy is sensitive in her approach but she still speaks the truth no matter how hard it is to hear. She’s also very encouraging and validating with our feelings!
If you’re considering Warriors, DO IT!!! There’s nothing else out there like this program. When I was in therapy & SANON I felt like I was drowning without any guidance on how to get to the surface. Now I can finally breathe because my head is above water. This program covers everything you need to fully recover & heal. I feel like a whole new person.
Before I found The Mod and joined Warriors my husband and I did weekly therapy sessions, a 3 day intensive with Heart to Heart & attended weekly SANON meetings. They were only slightly helpful. Every therapist or group leader talked about boundaries but nobody ever showed me or told me how to create them. Not once was a purge ever recommended or suggested.
I also love how the coaches don’t judge you for doubting & checking up on your husband. I’m 12 steps they made me feel guilty for tracking him or for investigating if he was still acting out. I love how the coaches validate our need to look for continuity.
I’m forever grateful that I found The Mod!! It truly has changed my life & given me more & better tools to use not just in my marriage but in all relationships of my life.”
“Before The Knights I was honestly quite nervous about how the program was going to go, but because of the importance of the material and how much we needed this course, I was also a little bit excited.
The biggest obstacles people find are money, time, and their spouse. First of all, if you don’t have the time to invest in to your relationship, there’s not much hope in the first place. The one big one for us was money. Finances are always tight with us, but we were able to move some things around financially, sit down and do a bit of a budget session, and make it work. And timing was perfect as well as the coaches offer regular discounts for the programs.
The Knights is uncovering a lot of past hurt between my wife and I, but more than anything it is helping me develop a habit of honesty and communication which is solidifying a new foundation between my wife and I.
The best part for me has been the slack group. It has become an absolute pillar in my daily life, as I am able to dump all of my thoughts and garbage on them on a regular basis, which helps me process my thoughts and come back to my relationship with a healthy approach. I’m able to share my thoughts feelings and emotions with the group, instead of putting the burden on my wife. We all support each other, share with each other, and love on each other.
Since joining Knights, my wife and I have been able to develop and work on a very solid base of communication through regular sharing of our daily thoughts and our daily activities. We sit down every night and talk, so that the little issues never have a chance to grow into the big issues
Second, I have learned a handful of tools and techniques to help me battle various addictive habits in my day to day lifestyle, and many exercises with help me start to understand why I have done some of the things I have done
Third, and I apologize if this is too much information for anyone reading this, but I’ve been able to stop masturbating, looking at porn, and drinking as well through various approaches I have learned in this group and the severity of their effects.
What I see as special and unique about the way the coaches do things is that these coaches aren’t just educated experts, but they also have experience in the related fields of addiction and trauma. And each coach has a specified field of expertise, so they are able to collaborate their experience to provide the best coaching possible.
I love that Chloe is direct, doesn’t beat around the bush, is very descriptive and knowledgeable, & I love that so much and her field of expertise is based around science and physiology.
Savvy is creative, reflective, and very descriptive in her coaching. She uses fantastic metaphorical explanations and analogies to communicate her message and her answer.
If you’re on the fence about joining The Knights, let me tell you there is no substitute for experience. Let me say that again. There is no substitute for experience. A therapist or similar type of professional help is educated from the books, and everything is based on Theory. While they may be very smart, and have a lot of knowledge, there is nobody that is better equipped to assist you then somebody who has been through it before and has cleared that mine field. Because of the 3 very specific fields of expertise they do an excellent job at educating you and opening your eyes to the world that you have been living, and how to leave that world behind you.
My wife and I finally have a small glimpse of the potential of our relationship. We understand that this is going to take a long time, and a lot of work, but this program so far has acted as a very intense springboard that will launch us into the next phase of our lives. We are extremely grateful for what we have learned through the programs, and the help that the coaches have given us so far to learn what we need to to help our own individual recoveries, & to help our relationship thrive, not just survive.”
“When I found The Mod, I found The Betrayed’s Haven group. I was lost, scared, depressed, hopeless, confused. Joining The Betrayed’s Haven helped. It helped A LOT, but it only took me so far.
I got to a point where I was ready to move forward and didn’t even realize it. Not until I noticed that staying in the betrayed’s haven was keeping me there. Stuck in that stage. Every story I read, every frustration from everyone else just added another layer of shit on top of me holding me back. I wanted to heal. I needed to move past this with or without my husband. I needed it for me. I needed it for my kids.
We were told The Warriors program is intense. That’s a serious understatement. It’s more than intense. It’s grueling at times. But it’s so good. The harder it gets the better you feel.
There have been times I seriously questioned if I could keep going. But all of the beautiful women, my fellow Warriors, along with all 3 coaches would listen to my feelings. Validate me. Empathize with me. Build me back up. Ask what I need, and sometimes help me figure out what I need, and help me figure out how to get it. We push each other forward. There’s no doubt that I’ve formed lasting true friendships with these women, and one man.
I’ve learned so much about myself in just these first few weeks and I know it’s only just begun. I’ve begun to see who I truly am and what I truly want from life and a relationship. I know you’re probably not putting much thought into that statement, I kind of didn’t either. But it really happens. In a big big way!! I’ve had so many revelations and even gained closure on past hurts. Now I feel hopeful. I’m starting to feel a tiny glimmer of trust in my husband. It’s easier for me to figure out what I need and want in a situation and I’m feeling strong enough to demand it.
My husband and I have had more communication since starting our respective programs than we’ve had in our entire relationship. What’s more, it’s actually meaningful communication.
This isn’t just a job for these coaches as is the case with many. They are all in. It’s their life. They are more knowledgeable than anyone I’ve ever met. Hands down. I’ve yet to see them stumped by any question or situation, and we threw a LOT at them. Sometimes in rapid fire. I really don’t know how they kept up with us sometimes. They don’t give you all the answers. They teach you and guide you to reveal them on your own.
Savvy is kind of like the mother. She guides you in a sensitive way to demand a better, safer and more healthy environment for yourself. Because she’s been where we are and she understands how you feel and why you feel that way.
And then there’s Chloe. I like to compare her to the crazy, fun aunt that knows her way around a betrayal, and your sex life. Seriously, any question you could ever have about sex I’d bet big money she knows the answer to it. The one that tells you what you need to hear, not necessarily what you want to hear. After a while though, your needs become your wants. She’s tricky like that.
You can always ask any of the coaches your most personal, private questions that you’re too embarrassed or ashamed to even say out loud. They’ve heard it all before. They never pass judgement. Ever.
My husband has changed dramatically since starting his Knights program. He really is an entirely new person. Before admitting his addiction he was a selfish, self centered, self serving, emotionless, unfeeling, uncaring, uninvolved man child. I used to tell people I have 5 children. 4 young ones and one man child. After admitting he white knuckled. He improved as an overall person but not a lot, not consistently and not in a way that would last.
Since starting his Knights program he’s done a full 180. He’s not recovered yet. He still has flaws. He still makes mistakes. But the difference is his attitude. He is fully committed to himself, his recovery and me. He’s making the choice everyday. I see consistent, real changes in him. His attitude, his demeanor, literally everything.
After only 3 weeks he is caring, he has no rage, he’s not angry, he’s thoughtful, he’s having feelings and emotions and not thinking about porn or masturbating or when he will have the next opportunity to get his next fix. He’s becoming a partner in our relationship instead of just someone who lives here that I have to take care of. He doesn’t look at me like I’m here solely for his use and disposal. He looks at me like I’m a real person. An equal. He’s feeling real love for me that he’s never felt before. He’s having thoughts, feelings and emotions that he’s never had before and who knows if he ever would have had it not been for the Knights program.
If you are even remotely considering joining the program…just do it. I promise you, you will not regret it. If it’s money holding you back, I get that. It was a huge factor for me too. But now, knowing what I do and as far as we’ve come I’d pay 10 times what I did all day every day. That’s how truly worth it this is. I’d spend my last dollar without hesitation. Do whatever you need to do to make it happen. Just make it happen.
I also would strongly encourage you to join as a couple. You will get so much out of this, it’s so fulfilling to go through this together. It’s a bond like no other. My husband and I rarely spoke to each other and if we did there wasn’t much meaning to anything. Now, we never stop talking. We have a real relationship that is only getting better. He is healing individually and I am healing individually. You can’t put a price on that.”
“Entering The Knights I was desperate to save my marriage. Money was an obstacle because of our budget. In Knights I felt optimistic of the future and hopeful! One of the biggest impacts was the coaches knowledge base and knowing with the other Knights I am not alone in this fight.
The most valuable part for me was learning about betrayal trauma and what my spouse is going through and completely understanding her feelings.
Me and my spouse can actually communicate without just yelling at each other now. My newfound knowledge on gaslighting has made me Express my feelings more and not manipulate situations. Also assistance in any questions I had when going through recovery was so important and valuable.
Thinking about The Knights for you? This is different because the coaches are always there to assist and keep you vigilant in all activities and the coaches are truly there to help.
Before Knights I had one therapist session. Therapist did not recognize sex and porn addiction and tried to blame wife that it was her weight gain that led to my watching porn.
The Mod, however, saw wife’s betrayal trauma and knew I needed help. The Mod has a great coaching team that focuses to heal not only on the addict but also the betrayed’s.”
“Before entering Savvy’s program, I was feeling scared, but somewhat hopeful but unsure about how the program could help us. When we graduated the program, I felt confident that we had the tools, skills, and resources to work on our relationship and overcome obstacles as they come up; I also feel way more emotionally “open” with James. The biggest impact the program had was working on trust and open communication in the moment, especially with regards to arguing (or, preventing arguments) and learning how to argue effectively.
I found the most value came from the 60-minute sessions and the homework was extremely beneficial. Honestly, the entire program was super intentional and beneficial. Our relationship has changed with having fewer arguments, we feel more emotionally open/connected and have more one-on-one time that is more intentional and balanced (i.e. we go out AND stay in). Savvy is extremely compassionate and knowledgeable and validating. Her program is clear cut and straight forward while also being challenging and validating to our individual needs (as well as our needs as a couple).
If you have tried other types of help and are thinking about joining Savvy’s program, DO IT! Seriously, I couldn’t recommend Savvy and her program enough. Having a third-party who is objective while also being empathetic and validating is a RARE find in a coach of ANY sort. Savvy is someone who is very intuitive and patient. She treats you both as individuals while also teaching you how to be an actual team as a couple. I am SO grateful for Savvy and her program. My relationship with James is one of the most important relationships I have ever had. Before her program I was honestly doubting our abilities to live together and to make it through as a team. Savvy’s help honestly saved us, and I am confident we will be together for many more years to come!”
“I was white knuckling through 2 years of relapses and not getting what I need from therapist or 12 step programs. Before SSR and The Knights.
Since being in the program I have changed my communication greatly with my wife. I have change my emotions my routines my self awareness and my attitudes to name a few adjustments. I feel the coaches have challenged me when I need it and have supported me when I am making the correct choices. The coaches always have an answer to my questions.
My partner has gained a sense of community from the warriors she also has tools and light at the end of the tunnel she was afraid that there never would be anything that worked and now she sees a chance to this will work.
If you are considering joining I would tell you that you have eveeything to gain from joining your own self respect your ability to think for yourself your career your relationships, and you just might loose the addiction that is ruling your world. I wish this program existed 20 years ago.”
“Before Warriors I was feeling lost, depressed, anxious and defeated. My spouse and my own skepticism were my biggest obstacles. I had a breakdown one night and just told him something had to change or I was leaving. I told him I wanted to try this program and he agreed.
Being in Warriors I feel stronger and more informed about this issue. I’m still very anxious and depressed but that’s mainly because I’m not sure if he is truly working the recovery and I just don’t know if he will continue to stay in recovery. His wavering makes my anxiety and depression go up. This program I think is making me strong enough to leave if he doesn’t continue.
The best part of this program for me is the information and a different way of thinking and dealing with the situations. I have gained a lot of information on what to watch for, how to think of things from his perspective. I have also gained a ton of knowledge about how the addicted brain works and how to work with that.
The BRoACH and Micro-Trust Module were the most valuable to me, and I love the slack group and ACE exercise! My husband and I are more open and honest. I feel stronger and better equipped to deal with the addiction and the consequences. He is more aware of how this has affected me and himself. Recovery is now a daily thing not just once in a while.
The coaches are great at making the information easy to understand and it comes from people who have been there and understands the dynamics. Chloe is very real and passionate with the clients and Savvy is sweet, understanding and supportive.
If you’re considering Warriors it is a wonderful program that helps the SSA and the betrayed work side by side to make changes to promote healing.”
“I was so excited entering SSR. I was ready to make the next step in my recovery. Through SSR it has made me feel so good to actually see the true me, the one I haven’t seen in a long time. The biggest impact SSR has had on me is that it feels like a second chance at life. I was on the verge of destroying my marriage, which is the greatest thing I have ever had.
The most valuable part of SSR is the open communication that slack messages offers as well as the information from the monthly calls.
SSR has changed many things for me, but the main things are that I have emotions for the first time and actually know how I feel during these emotions. Me and my wife’s communication is outstanding. I actually feel no fear in telling her how I feel and she doesn’t either. We tell each other everything now – the good and the bad. I’m also so much calmer and willing to listen without giving my opinion.
I am currently working towards 90 day celibacy, to show my wife that she is important and matters and that she is loved by me, as weel as working on having complete control of my thoughts while in public.
The coaches at The Mod are straight to the point with their knowledge and what they think. If you’re thinking about joining SSR, you have nothing to lose by trying! SSR has all the tools to give you a sober life if you choose to join. It will save everything you love if you put in the work.
Thank you to the coaches and others in SSR to get me to where I am today. I am looking forward to moving to the next level of recovery in Become a Knight group program!”
“Before my wife found The Mod and we joined Knights & Warriors I was feeling frustrated at counseling and 12-step. Had also been to an intensive and all of the things were the same. I was getting nowhere and neither was my wife.
I had dealt with my childhood trauma and hadn’t looked at porn or masturbated in 6+ months but something was missing.
In Knights I feel pretty awesome actually. I love that the slack group can be a place to vent and get feedback. Normal group doesn’t allow “crosstalk”, which I find to be an incredible waste of time.
I love the information related to communication. Learning more about IA and the way you incorporate many of the same types of exercises that I am doing in the 90-day outside IA workbook I am doing is awesome.
Since joining Knights and Warriors my wife and I feel much more emotionally connected but are just sort of relearning each other as it relates to intimacy. We gone through the 90 days that also included no touch and sleeping in separate rooms and our lovemaking is much more close and passionate with each other. More connected if you will.
We talk about much deeper topics, even aside from recovery, and have created a safe space for each other to share and be heard.
We are much more patient with each other and less on the defensive.
We have much less tension overall, which was validated in a visit to our daughter’s house after not seeing them for a little over two months and her fiancé said we seemed much more relaxed and tension free with each other.
I enjoy the interaction with all the coaches and appreciate the twice per week calls to be able to vocalize what I don’t always have the time to put into writing. Chloe is direct and to the point with clients, and Savvy is pretty laid back and has clearly put into practice a lot of what she talks about. I appreciate the stories and the examples she gives and how she finds a way to relate to people.
Knights gets to the deeper issues much quicker than traditional therapy. The group is interactive and there all day, not one a day or week at a scheduled time. The calls are an added bonus and the betrayal trauma model is key to healing the betrayed partner and ultimately hopefully the relationship.
Thinking of joining? Do it! Before Knights I was in Individual counseling with CSAT including a clinical disclosure, 3 day intensive at Heart to Heart including lie detector test, Group sessions led by CSAT, 12-step for SA, andCouples counseling.
The initial counseling and intensive really pushed me to deal with my past and source of trauma and find out the background to my issues. They did very little for my wife, even though they said they followed the betrayal trauma model.
I did the 12-steps all the way through but found the groups full of people who were sort of addicted to the group and there was no sharing or crosstalk.
Couples just ended up in them treating her like a codependent at times and just causing arguments.
The approach The Mod and the coaches take by having both sides work their recovery in tandem is a much more holistic and effective approach.”
“Entering Warriors I was feeling anxious and scared. The biggest obstacle for me was that my spouse isn’t and wasn’t supportive of me being in this program. How I overcame it was that I just decided to take care of me!
I was feeling overwhelmed and didn’t know how to move forward, so I jumped on board without even telling my husband. I did end up telling him the week before it started because he needed to watch our kids so I could take my calls!
I’ve been feeling more confident and knowledgeable since joining Warriors. I’m feeling more valued and not crazy! I’m also feeling a bit stalled since my husband refuses to work with me on anything, but I’m still making forward progress!!!
Warriors biggest impact on me has been my confidence and the validation I’ve received to confirm that I’m right and not crazy.
I found BRoACH to be the most valuable. It’s been great! I’ve build my self confidence through this program. I’m able to take the emotion out of my responses and communicate more confidently and spot and call out gaslighting! I don’t entertain foolishness and I’m not moving around in the dark anymore. I feel like I’m moving forward and not stuck in the “I don’t know what to do” stage anymore.
I’ve also been more emotionally stable. My work life has been less stressful as I’m learning to work through and not bottle up emotions and by having an outlet to talk about my betrayal trauma it isn’t leaking into work anymore. I know I am safe and have a group of people behind me. I’ve been more emotionally available to my own children and also to my students.
The coaching team at the mod is special because of all the different approaches and collaborations. I love how they work together to answer our questions.
Chloe is direct and matter of fact and she let’s emotion shine through in a positive way. Savvy’s ability to relate and give hope, her wealth of knowledge is all amazing!
If you’re thinking about joining Warriors It’s not like anything else ! If your on the fence think of it this way!
I’ve always cooked my eggs in an old frying pan, the heat isn’t dispersed evenly and the lid handle isn’t coated so I always slightly burn my fingers when removing them. I’m used to it and I’ve come to just accept that my eggs will always be so/so and my fingers will get a bit burned.
Well one day my mom bought me a new egg pan and lid that was coated. While I was excited I still was apprehensive to try it out. It’s new, what if my eggs aren’t cooked right or what if it’s worse ? Well after a few rounds of trial and error my new pan cooked my eggs perfectly! No laced bottoms, not over or undercooked and didn’t stick! My fingers didn’t get burned taking the lid off. It was so worth it !!! I wished I had bought a new pan a long time ago!!! Would have saved me lots of burned fingers and so/so eggs
So if your tired of burned fingers and so/so eggs aka betrayal trauma and a relationship based on lies you’ve found yourself in the right place!”
“Before joining SSR at The Mod, I was lost with no sense of what was wrong with me. By joining SSR I have a clear view of what I must do to have the life I want. SSR has let me know I am not alone in this fight and gives me the resources I need to help me recover from this addiction. The best part of SSR is having Chloe, and Savvy 24/7 to answer my thoughts and questions. I’ve already seen a change in the communication with my wife about my feelings, I understand what addiction is now and how to fight it, and I have hope now, when 2 months ago I didn’t have any. Savvy and Chloe work well together. If you’re thinking about joining SSR, just try it and see what good coaching can do for your life and family!”
“Before joining The Warriors I was soaking up growth in The Betrayed’s Haven. I felt like I was really committed to healing and wanting to move passed betrayal trauma as efficiently as I could. I also knew I could not do this alone, at least not in the time frame I wanted that would allow me to enjoy my life after this tragedy. I felt ready to take on more and take ownership of my journey and simultaneously learn how to relinquish my need for control. I was excited, nervous and scared to get this program going. I was even more terrified of stepping outside my comfort zone, The Betrayed’s Haven; the safe haven after so much destruction. The unknown can be so terrifying. But I knew if I was going to amp this up, I needed to leave the minors for the majors. I can’t be present in both arenas at once. I chose to keep moving forward even in fear of unknown. I also felt like I was moving forward with other winners who chose themselves too. All being led by these three amazing coaches who believe in us and our healing. For the circumstances, you can’t really ask for more.
We’ve been in the program for 3 weeks now and I’m getting an abundance of information on the “how.” I feel like I’m finally moving forward in my own journey. It’s crazy to feel I’ve hardly begun even with so much of the hard stuff behind us already. I’m learning how to read my heart, speak my truth and stand up for my needs. I’m learning how to apply healthy coping skills into my life to navigate the betrayal trauma. Overall, this journey has remained a scary rollercoaster but I’d rather keep moving forward and taking the dips than spinning round and round in life just praying maybe one day, it will be different but I keep just seeing the same thing over and over again. I’d love to say I’m no longer fearful and am resilient beyond measure. But that’s not how it works. I think here I am learning how to build courage and resilience within me to apply to my life. It’s simply not a one and done task. I know I will grow to my absolute best potential here, but the work is never done. Here, I learn how to and how to keep going, no matter the obstacles. This is also part of the reason you can’t do this alone. You will be in fear as this journey unfolds and over time and effort you will become greater than your fears. You need a support system to help push you forward in the face of fear. Fear will always be, but here I feel almost unstoppable!
This program is unique in it’s resources, structure and purpose. Coaching is more about application and requires the student to be proactive in their growth journey. It’s very different than the student-teacher relationship that most of us are used to. Teaching applies to all students to match a bar or standard, no matter his/hers skill, aptitude or learning technique. But coaching is individualistic. The coach meets you where you are at and has you apply from there. We all have our own individual bars that we will grow to. The dynamic can be challenging to master. With this spirit, the coaches have their work cut out for them. They have intimate knowledge of each of their clients and the direction of healing that best suits them. This program blueprint allows us to have the best of both worlds for both knowledge and practical works. The system is built to help you earn your freedom after betrayal trauma. They don’t want mindless dependents following them forever but instead to actually help and release us back into life with confidence, knowledge, skill and compassion. To help us learn how to stand on our own two feet again, like we did once before. With that blueprint for growth in mind, the coaches monitor our journey giving an occasional nudge in the right direction. Because of their experience and expertise they can foresee the potential challenges and roadblocks and aim to equip us with the ability to navigate them. Here, we are blossoming and they nurture us in a hands off fashion. It is different than when I was in The Betrayed’s Haven; because I was different and my needs and challenges were greater then.
My husband took off running shortly after Dday. He’s not perfect but he is running with me. When we were given the opportunity to join The Knights & The Warriors he jumped at it. He was hesitant and shared a lot of the same fears I had. But he knew this was the next step. He knew I would join with or without him so he chose with. He too is enjoying the abundance of information and is applying it to all areas in his life. He is making huge strides in healing and in leadership. This program and healing has revealed to him who he felt he always was but had a hard time accessing it. He loves the companionship with the other members in The Knights; he too feels like he is running with winners. Running for change, recovery and their lives. My husband is learning how to be transparent with me and he is also learning healthy coping skills and mindset. He has been ever evolving since Dday and this program really helped him raise the bar to where he would like it. He applies everything he learns to every facet in his life and I’m proud to call him my husband.
If I could talk to someone who is considering joining I would ask them what is holding them back? I would ask them if that was more important to them than getting their life back. Rather, their new life. This whole journey completely offset my entire plan and purpose in life. I knew there was a limited amount of time to get it back on track and that I alone couldn’t accomplish what needed to be done. I had no idea what happened in my life or how to fix it. The Betrayed’s Haven for me, helped me figure out what happened; and Warriors for me, is how to fix it. It’s simply not enough to know what happened. You still have to make amends in order to enjoy life. If you only know what happened, you only learn to live in Betrayal Trauma. The point is not to stay there. The next step is to help you move through and passed it. Do whatever it takes to join; your future self will thank you.”
“Leveling up to The Knights from SSR had me feeling scared, excited, lost, confused, and optimistic.
Money was the biggest obstacle for me and my wife. Finding the money was hard, but am so thankful that we made it work. I would do it over 10 fold with out hesitation. With out each other we truly wouldn’t have anything. Time was a concern but not an obstacle. I was and am willing to give everything I got to recovery. And came in with this thought.
I feel amazingly happy. I have feelings and emotions that I didn’t even know existed in me. It has opened my eyes and ears to everything around me. And has given me a path to fallow that is healthy and is letting the old path to disappear. For the first time in my life I feel like I am health in my mind. It is amazing to feel this and is truly hard to put in too words.
I really like a lot of the brain science and understand why this addiction is so hard to just put down like a pack of cigarettes and never touch again. It had given me insight to make the tools work for me in my recovery. I truly enjoyed every sessions, group, program and embraced every step.
The biggest is the emotional connection. It is bigger and stronger then we EVER had. It is unreal to have what seems to be simple conversation with my wife and her eyes light up. And say to me that she is turned on in just hearing me speak. Or she has joy in her voice when we talk. We can actually set down and talk about the bad in life and never raise our voice or be so defensive. We can actually talk about everything and I truly mean everything. She knows all of me and my dark secrets and is still here. It has been amazing feeling to be with someone that loves you for how your becoming. I have also been able to have a drive to work 50 hours a week and still completely take over the fiscal chores around the house so that my wife could get rest. And actually enjoy it.
I feel that Knights is a family style investment. And a real healthy one. Savvy is the mother to over see and monitor everything, Chloe is the crazy aunt that you can talk about the uncomfortable topics and get guidance with. And has a way to touch every one with an analogy.
Chloe is straight forward answers with resolution to the information. It is great for me to here the whys and hows. She is great at conveying them. She is also stern when needed and gentle when the topic is sensitive.
Savvy is very gentle and soft spoken so when things are rough or emotional it is easy to communicate with her.
If you are wanting better and don’t know how or why it isn’t, then you are at the right place and as long as you put in the work you will get what you need at The Mod to over come so much more then just your addiction.
Before The Mod, I had help from therapy’s with drug addictions prior but never had what I have gotten from The Mod from my porn/masturbation addiction. It has so much more personal connection with healing then I have ever experiences.
I owe the coaches everything I have and will continue doing to stay sober for the rest of my life. It has given me a place that I always told my self that I wanted and has given me the direction to follow through with it. And that is to be the best husband and father I can be. Thank you all so much. I truly feel that you are working miracles here.”
“Before entering SSR I was feeling a little apprehensive, nervous, and actually a tad excited. I feel almost all my apprehension is gone and feel quite comfortable sharing with the guys in SSR. I would say learning about myself and the brain and addiction has had the biggest impact on my recovery. The most valuable part of SSR is the relationship suggestions the coaches give, and knowing that I can both support and love my wife in a safer and healthier environment now that I’m in recovery.
I have been able to, for the first time, be completely honest with my wife, and able to be comfortable with sharing with her what I used to think was insignificant or silly feelings from day to day. SSR has helped our relationship feel that spark again through coaching on true intimacy and relationship values, and on a mental, physical, and spiritual level. Everything from our thoughts, feelings, looks, kisses, and hugs have been amplified. Even the most base intimacy is so special again. Chloe and Savvy have helped my wife and I exercise self control through the idea of the 90 day celibacy, which is also from what we’re seeing to be an awesome way to reset ourselves and our brains!
It’s pretty special the way Chloe and Savvy communicate their messages to the group and how they conduct themselves in a professional, yet welcoming manner. If you’re thinking about joining SSR, go for it! I am genuinely and purely enjoying this group, course, and posts. I love learning about myself and enjoying the self improvement. I am always checking Slack to see if there’s a new post or response, to the point where my work day is longer because I pull my truck over to read the posts all the time!”
“Before entering The Warriors, I was in The Betrayed’s Haven which helped me tremendously, however, I was ready for that next step. I was ready to put recovery into full force. Before The Betrayed’s Haven, I was completely lost and had no idea how to tackle the issues my husband and I were having. I felt hopeless about our marriage.
I would say my spouse was about 90% on board. There was a small part of him that was apprehensive, but luckily, at that point, he was willing to do whatever it took. Thankfully, money was not a huge obstacle for us but it still felt like we were taking a leap of faith. Of course, me being in The Betrayed’s Haven, I already had a lot of faith in the coaches and the program, but again, my husband was a little apprehensive. Time management was the issue we were both the most concerned about. For me, it was about the unknown…not knowing exactly how much time in my day I was going to have to dedicate to recovery. With my husband’s brutal work schedule at the time, we were both very concerned he would not be able to keep up. However, his job schedule changed so time ha not been an issue. Either way, I believe he would have been able to make it work.
I’ve gained way more knowledge than I could have ever imagined. There is no doubt, we are getting every penny’s worth out of this program. I definitely believe that I will walk away from this program with all of the tools I need to move forward. I feel super confident in my recovery, and my husband’s recovery. I’ve seen huge changes in him and our marriage in a short period of time. I know we both still have a lot of work to do, but for the first time in years, I feel hopeful about our future, and that is priceless!
Warriors has given me hope. I have faith now, that my marriage will be okay. This program has lifted so much weight off my shoulders. I no longer wake up every morning feel depressed and anxious. Of course, I have my bad moments/days still, but they are much less frequent and not as intense.
I’d have to say, the most valuable aspect of the program for me is, the endless dedication that the coaches show us every single day. Every single question is answered and answered thoroughly. No question is too much for the coaches. They have literally thought of everything, covered every aspect of this addiction. If I could add one more thing, it would be the group environment. Learning from my peers, having their love and support, has meant the world to me.
Since Warriors, my depression and anxiety have subsided greatly. I feel a sense of calmness and peacefulness, as well as hopefulness. The second way my life has changed, is I feel more emotionally connected to my husband, than I have in years. And lastly, there is more transparency, honesty, and communication than there has ever been in my marriage.
This coaching team works day in and day out, every single day. I would be surprised if there are other coaches out there that are as dedicated as Chloe and Savvy.
I love Chloe’s no B.S. approach. She tells it like it is. Her knowledge about sex is truly mind blowing. I would have never imagined how complex this topic can be. Everything I’ve learned from her so far has been fascinating. I love that I feel like I can ask her about literally anything, no matter how weird or embarrassing I think it may be. She has an answer for everything and never makes you feel judged.
Savvy and Chloe are the perfect pair because they balance each other out. Savvy is still very straight forward, but in a more delicate way. She is super knowledgeable and gives amazing guidance. I love that she opens up and shares her own personal experiences to give us great examples to help us understand something better.
Looking for help elsewhere? Okay, but you’re not going to find anything like this program. In my opinion, these coaches, the way they work, and the program they have created are truly unique and one of a kind. There has not been one single time that I’ve second guessed or doubted my trust and confidence in this program. There is no guess work here. We are instructed on exactly what needs to be achieved, and I don’t think you can find that kind of guidance anywhere else. We are set up with tools and knowledge that we can apply to our everyday lives. I think the coaches have done a marvelous job with this program. They listen to their clients.
Before finding The Mod I’ve had very brief experiences with therapy. I shared in The Betrayed’s Haven how awful my experience was and how dangerous it can be to go to a therapist who really doesn’t know what they’re talking about. I’ve tried marriage support groups which turned out to not be helpful at all. Books and YouTube videos are okay, but nothing compared to The Mod. The only other help I’ve received was from The Betrayed’s Haven which was amazingly helpful.
I’d just like to thank the coaches at The Mod for all of your dedication to the program and your clients. Its obvious that you all have such amazing big hearts and truly care about those you work with. This world needs more people like Savvy and Chloe! You all are saving marriages…saving children from broken homes. You all have inspired both my husband and I to one day help people with this addiction and with Betrayal Trauma. I will never be able to thank you all enough!!”
“Before The Knights I was in SSR. And before that I was lost, confused, and barred in a mountain of lies. I had been addicted to pornography and masturbation for 23 years. It had lead me down a path that I had made many unhealthy choices. I had destroyed many relationships and was on the verge of destroying my current marriage. During these 23 years I had many other addictions that I had over come like drugs and alcohol. But porn and masturbation felt impossible to over come. No matter where I turned it was starting me in the face and pushing me around it.
Once in The Knights program I had learned many challenges I had to over come and tools to help me get there. It has been a REAL eye opener in to how badly this addiction affects every aspect of your mind and brain and really takes hold of you and won’t let go.
The biggest change to date is my relationship with my wife. I have an amazing relationship now and it is truly better then the day I meet her. It has been amazing. I am no longer explosive with my thoughts and reactions. And I have emotions and thoughts that I have never had before. It has gotten me back on track to my morals and dreams in life.
The coaches are the best. I have seen and been around many therapists and counselors in the past and none of them hold a candle to these coaches. They go out of there way it feels like to help everyone in the program. They are very intelligent people that know there stuff about this addiction. They have experience and knowledge of the brain disease. And guide you through every step.
My wife is in The Warriors and I thank god for it. It was her saving grace to life. It has changed her in many ways then I could have ever imagined. She is strong and determined now and has trust and safety with me now, which she had never had before. She has learned everything about me and my addiction and despite all of it The Warriors group helped her to love me.
If you are considering joining The Knights I’m telling you this, it is worth every penny. It will give you tools, guidance, strength, and will give you control over this addiction. As long as you commit to the program and give it your all it will change your life. I work a 50 hour week and no others that work more then me and you will have time as long as you are devoted to having a healthy life.
This program is a community of people that are in your shoes or have been in your shoes. Know ones shit is special, it is still shit. And NO one of any of use are here or have been here to judge you. You are in control of your destiny and The Knights will guide you to rise up and over power this disease’s.”
“When I found Warriors, before I joined, I was despondent, frustrated, sad, powerless. The money was very intimidating, but I knew I was worth it. Since Warriors I feel more empowered.
Doing BRoACH has been very empowering. Having the daily reinforcement from other women who get where I’ve been is huge.
Corresponding with other group members plus consistent coach support is most important to me.
I have clarity around my boundaries and I feel especially SURE of them. After all the gaslighting, even though I intellectually understood that I was on the right track, there were many times I second-guessed myself and wondered if I was being too tough on him or expecting too much. The program/group reassured me over and over that I have NOT asked for too much.
I am still preparing a BRoACH for myself, and when this is done, I will have a clear and concise set of personal values to refer to which will also help me to set up a daily routine.
I love my accountability buddy and love knowing that she is there for me—it’s made me feel less alone.
The coaches are all unique and special in that they are abnormally direct and affirmative in their approach. They have a clear methodology that is concise and step-by-step. They pull no punches and there is no bullshit—yet the three of them are approachable, kind and supportive!
I love Chloe’s directness. She knows her stuff and she doesn’t candy coat anything. I love how sure she is about what she’s doing. She’s no softie–but she is caring and loving. I also love her sense of humor!
Savvy is super down to earth and easy to talk to. Her style is calm and approachable, and I love that she shares her personal experiences–this makes her easy to connect to!
The Mod’s Warriors program is uniquely and radically different from any other program in that it addresses betrayal trauma and addiction on multiple levels. This is the “HOW TO” program that gives people practical things to do. These things address the neurology behind addiction in a way that I’ve not seen before (i.e. the purge). These actions empower the betrayed in ways that therapy or self-help don’t. This program goes way beyond affirming the pain of the betrayed or defining the symptoms or what’s “normal;” while it does do those things, it puts the power back into the hands of the betrayed in a very concrete way.”
“Before Knights I was a little nervous about what I was getting into. Also hoping it would help me. My wife wanted me to do this and I feel like I’m making baby steps to recovery with loads of knowledge to keep me moving forward towards becoming whole again!
The amount of honesty and courage I see in the other guys. It helps me on my down days to getup and keep fighting. The calls do a lot for me just having all coaches available to talk or answer our questions. Also as rough as it was the purges helped tremendously give me a clean start.
The coaches allow us to help each other daily in the group with thoughts and feelings but if there’s a problem that’s above us you coaches are there to step in and give advice when we need it.
Chloe answers every question about sex with dignity toward person asking. No matter what you ask she gives you straight answer no bull.
Savvy is such a sweet person and easy to talk to. She always has good advice about keeping relationships going.
If you’ve looked at Knights and are thinking about joining, I have been helped here more than I ever imagined I could be. They have helped me realize what I’m dealing with and offered concrete ways to fight it and stay in recovery.
I just want to thank all the coaches at The Mod for showing me how I can have my life back and become an honorable man again. On who can love again others as well as himself.”