Private 7 month program for married couples to work individual recovery in tandem while laying the foundations for a successful marital reconstruction.
Knights & Warriors is an amazingly personalized program for those struggling with SSA (Sexual Stimulation Addiction – Masurbation, Pornography, and/or Sex addiction) and Betrayal Trauma. In our program we walk you step-by-step through the process of your individual recovery so that you can enter marriage recovery 100% prepared.
Most couples make the dire mistake of looking for couples help first when they realize there is a sexual addiction present in the marriage.
Couples therapy, when addiction is present, doesn’t work. The truth is, couples therapy looks at both parties as equally responsible for the problem, and the reality is only one person is responsible for the addiction. That’s the person suffering from addiction. Not the betrayed partner.
In Knights & Warriors you are both working individual recovery alongside each other, so that neither of you is left behind waiting for the other to catch up or even enter recovery.
“Before I found The Mod and joined Warriors my husband and I did weekly therapy sessions, a 3 day intensive with Heart to Heart & attended weekly SANON meetings. They were only slightly helpful.
Every therapist or group leader talked about boundaries but nobody ever showed me or told me how to create them. Not once was a purge ever recommended or suggested.
This program covers everything you need to fully recover & heal. I feel like a whole new person.”
While working individual recovery, we weave in foundations of a successful relationship throughout the program so that by the end of the 7 months you are feeling not only empowered as individuals, but feeling strong as a couple that will make it to the other side of this journey.
This program was designed by Chloe and myself from our own recovery journeys and watching hundreds of others in this journey fail and make the same key mistakes over and over.
Starting with couple’s therapy
Not getting an individual therapist that is trained in sex addiction and betrayal trauma
Hiring coaches who have never gone through this personally, are not certified, nor have the proper background education
Thinking it will just “go away” or that it’s not “so bad,” so you don’t reach out for help and end up compromising yourself, marriage, and family in the process
In Knights & Warriors we streamline your recovery so that you don’t get stuck for years in any of the big pitfalls.
“Since joining Knights, my wife and I have been able to develop and work on a very solid base of communication through regular sharing of our daily thoughts and our daily activities. We sit down every night and talk, so that the little issues never have a chance to grow into the big issues. My wife and I finally have a small glimpse of the potential of our relationship. We are extremely grateful for what we have learned through the programs, and the help that the coaches have given us so far to learn what we need to to help our own individual recoveries, & to help our relationship thrive, not just survive.”
In Knights & Warriors we go in depth into the most important aspects of all three recoveries.
Your journey begins with safety building & education
In the first month you will complete:
– Betrayal Trauma & Addiction Education
– The Purge
– Relapse Prevention Planning
– BRoACH (Boundaries, Rules of accountability, consequences, & honor).
This month’s focus is to gain stability and safety for all three recoveries.
We begin with education so that both of you are on the same page and can avoid common pitfalls and understand the unique dynamics as you enter recovery
We make sure that your environment is safe so that it’s not subconsciously sabotaging your recoveries
We make sure that neither one of you is engaged in Gaslighting so that healthy communication can return
You gain accountability so that you can attain the basis of trust
You build out your own relapse prevention plan so that if/when temptation hits, you are covered and will not relapse if you choose to use your plan
You each create your BRoACH so that every recovery is respected and that everyone understand what is safe and what is not safe
You each will understand the difference between disclosure material, daily accountability, honesty and transparency so that the risk of traumatization is low
“The BRoACH and Micro-Trust Module were the most valuable to me, and I love the slack group and ACE exercise! My husband and I are more open and honest. I feel stronger and better equipped to deal with the addiction and the consequences. He is more aware of how this has affected me and himself. Recovery is now a daily thing not just once in a while.”
Your journey evolves to lifestyle, fetish cycling, and sexual safety planning
In the second month you achieve:
Recovery Lifestyle Goals
Sexual Safety Planning
This month’s focus is for the one struggling with addiction to gain understanding of their
own addiction “fingerprint,” to achieve the personalized goals you’ve each set this month,
and to build out a sexual safety plan to begin the path to your erotic recovery.
Chloe works with the one struggling with addiction on fetish cycling to gain understanding and prepare for a disclosure post program
You will be achieving the lifestyle goals you’re creating
You will both create a sexual safety plan with Chloe’s help so that if/when you are ready for sex, that everyone feels confidentm, safe, and respected
Before my wife found The Mod and we joined Knights & Warriors I was getting nowhere and neither was my wife.
Since joining Knights and Warriors my wife and I feel much more emotionally connected but are just sort of relearning each other as it relates to intimacy.
Knights gets to the deeper issues much quicker than traditional therapy.
Thinking of joining? Do it! Before Knights I was in Individual counseling with CSAT including a clinical disclosure, 3 day intensive at Heart to Heart including lie detector test, Group sessions led by CSAT, 12-step for SA, and Couples counseling.
Couples counseling just ended up in them treating her like a codependent at times and just caused arguments.
The approach The Mod and the coaches take by having both sides work their recovery in tandem is a much more holistic and effective approach.
Your journey intertwines with Micro-Trust
In the third month:
The Betrayed Works on Trusting Themselves
The One Struggling With Addiction Works on Establishing Micro-Trust
Each Works Together To Build Trust Trust Back Into Their Daily Lives
This month’s focus is:
As the betrayed partner, you will deeply explore the broken trust so that you will know 100% when trust is being rebuilt from your partner
As the betrayed partner you will be distinguishing between intuition versus truam so that you can learn to trust yourself again
As the one struggling with addiction, you will be building on the trust that you’ve been working on since day 1 of this program, and will be diving deeper into the nuances that truly make the difference so that your partner can begin to give their heart back to you
Entering The Knights I was desperate to save my marriage.
In Knights one of the biggest impacts was the coaches knowledge base and knowing I am not alone in this fight.
The most valuable part for me was learning about betrayal trauma and what my spouse is going through and completely understanding her feelings.
Thinking The Knights is for you? The coaches are always there to assist and keep you vigilant in all activities and the coaches are truly there to help.
Before Knights I had one therapist session. Therapist did not recognize sex and porn addiction and tried to blame wife that it was her weight gain that led to my watching porn.
The Mod, however, saw wife’s betrayal trauma and knew I needed help. The Mod has a great coaching team that focuses to heal not only on the addict but also the betrayed’s.
Your journey deepens to self-care & coping skills
In the fourth month you will be working on:
What self-care is for you
How to love yourself again
How to continue building out coping skills
This month’s focus:
You will be building out your personalized self-care plan so that you are able to have down time to relax and feel ready to take on the next day
You will be adding to your coping skills, and expanding on what you’ve learned in the first couple months so that you can revamp the relapse prevention plan to make it even better
You will both be able to respect each other’s space in recovery so that neither one of you feels that the over is hovering/controlling the other’s recovery
Before joining The Warriors I was soaking up growth in The Betrayed’s Haven. I knew I could not do this alone, at least not in the time frame I wanted that would allow me to enjoy my life after this tragedy.
I was excited, nervous and scared to get this program going. But I knew if I was going to amp this up, I needed to leave the minors for the majors.
In Knights & Warriors, I learn how to keep going, no matter the obstacles. This is also part of the reason you can’t do this alone. You need a support system to help push you forward in the face of fear. Fear will always be, but here I feel almost unstoppable!
This program is unique in it’s resources, structure and purpose. Coaching is more about application and requires the student to be proactive in their growth journey. The coach meets you where you are at and has you apply from there.
If I could talk to someone who is considering joining I would ask them what is holding them back? I would ask them if that was more important to them than getting their life back. Rather, their new life.
The Betrayed’s Haven for me, helped me figure out what happened; and Warriors for me, is how to fix it.
Do whatever it takes to join; your future self will thank you.
Your journey rises with self-esteem
In the fifth month you will be working on:
Busting myths that have held you back in shame
Challenge your insecurities
Say goodbye to disgust and self-loathing
This month’s focus:
As the betrayed partner, we will work through this month to build back your self-esteem so that you believe and know that you are more than enough
As the one struggling with addiction, we will work throughout this month to build back your self-esteem so that you know and believe that you are not a bad person, and that you are more than enough as well
“This isn’t just a job for these coaches as is the case with many. They are all in. It’s their life. They are more knowledgeable than anyone I’ve ever met. Hands down.
My husband is an entirely new person. He’s making the choice everyday. I see consistent, real changes in him. His attitude, his demeanor, literally everything.
If you are even remotely considering joining the program, just do it. I promise you, you will not regret it. If it’s money holding you back, I get that. It was a huge factor for me too. But now, knowing what I do and as far as we’ve come I’d pay 10 times what I did all day every day. That’s how truly worth it this is. I’d spend my last dollar without hesitation. Do whatever you need to do to make it happen. Just make it happen.
Now, we have a real relationship that is only getting better. You can’t put a price on that.”
Your journey connects with romance, intimacy, and dating
In the sixth month you will be working on:
Every type of intimacy, as well as building the levels of intimacy
This month’s focus:
Now that there is a strong foundation of individual recovery with healthy foundations of a relationship, we expand to build out a fuller intimate life together through exploring the 11 types of intimacies and enhancing them to get from Level 1 to Level 7.
When exploring intimacies, romance will be explored as well. Each person’s unique ideas, definitions, and impressions of romance will be explored and implemented.
Dating can often be lost along the way of marriage, especially for parents and those who are going through recovery. We will be exploring dating ideas, schedules, and ways to make sure that your romantic relationship is the priority as you continue marital recovery.
Meet Sam, A Real Knight in Shining Armor
Your journey disembarks with disclosure preparation
In the seventh month you will be working on:
Preparing for the disclosure process with a qualified therapist
This month’s focus:
As the betrayed partner, Savannah will be helping you understand what will be helpful versus harmful so that when you get your disclosure you are validated, understood, and not retraumatized
As the one struggling with addiction, Chloe will be helping you build out the information you will need to disclosure to your partner when you find a therapist for your disclosure
As a couple you will get disclosure education so that you have realistic expectations, can tell when a therapist is not going to help you, and know what a positive disclosure experience looks like
You will have guidance in trying to find a qualified therapist and you will have post-disclosure support from us available so that you are surrounded by qualifed support throughout this process
When You Commit to Recovery & Graduate Knights & Warriors:
You will be confident, empowered, and free from the pain you were in entering the program
You will have the connection that you’ve been dying to have with each other!
You will have a healthy lifestyle to help keep you in a successful recovery
You will see the commitment each of you has to not only your individual recovery but to your marriage
You will understand addiction & trauma and feel 100% valid in your experiences
You will have the foundations needed to have a successful marriage
You will be clear in what you want for your future
You will see the world in a new perspective and be able to make the choices you need to be successful in recovery
New BONUS Modules in KW:
– Communication so that you can respect, hear, listen, validate, and understand one another.
– Structured Separation (optional) so that if there are any bumps in the road you can navigate a separation with purpose, direction, and goals
– Intimacy Anorexia (included if you are IA) so that you can work the IA recovery in tandem and get the strongest results for yourself and marriage
If you are married and are between the ages of 25-45 you qualify to apply to KW!
KW is an amazing program for the married couple who are ready to move heaven and earth to save themselves, their marriage, and family!
Needless to say, you must be driven to succeed in your recoveries and believe in yourselves.
KW is a $8,600 investment into your future (and yes, we do have payment plans!)
We know, it’s not cheap. But neither is a divorce (the average divorce costs $15K per person in the US, and we’ve even heard of divorces in the $130K range!). When you think of it that way, it quickly puts things into perspective!
We’ve seen so many couples (many of them clients) spend thousands on the wrong therapist and pay $3K-$10K for weeklong marriage intensives only for those options to fail them.
The truth is: Long-lasting change doesn’t happen in less than a week or with the wrong help.
Long-term change can only come from long-term commitment. Period.
KW was created to close the gaps of all the ways our clients and ourselves were failed by professionals in our healing journeys.
We took everything we knew worked and put it into this program to ensure that id you do the work, you will succeed.
Here’s a little secret about our clients…they come to us because everything else has failed them – therapy, take home programs, marriage intensives, and the big brand coaching companies.
They tried traditional routes that wasted thousands of dollars and precious time that they can never get back.
When you get accepted into KW, you will not be wasting your time or money. We show up 100% and are there with you every step of the way, challenging you, pushing you, guiding you, and supporting you through any bumps that come up in the road.
At The Mod, in KW, you are never alone.
Ready to move heaven and earth and change your life forever?
Upcoming KW Enrollment Dates (3 spots per enrollment):
If you’re interested in KW for September, please schedule your Interview and fill out the applications as soon as you know you are interested!
September Client benefits are that we are with your through one of the most challenging times of year – The Holidays – and thus we are there to guide you through any unforseen challenges. For anyone who has more emotional and relational triggers, September is a good round to join!